Frivolous

AA leggings 3-pack $78 ON SALE $63

AA dress: $36

Stella McCartney Perfume: $48

Sweet Kicks: $70

MAC 2x2 Custom Palette: $47.50

Bare Minerals Foundation: $25

I Hate Money

Spent This Break

Rent: $320

Energy: $115

Cable: $35

In The Heights Ticket: $85

Presents: $50

NYE: $70

Drinks, dinner, and Full Moon: at least $100

This is really starting to stress me out. I have some money coming my way, but not quickly enough and not from dependable sources (read: my mom). I was supposed to be able to support myself if I graduate without a high-paying job, but it's not looking like that will happen. I am so depressed at the thought of having to live at home for more than a month or two after I graduate, it's suffocating.

Really, I'm just stressed about so much at finances are the most concrete place to focus my anxiety. Cancelling NYE plans, the amount of stuff I've already committed to next semester, and getting a job (let's not even bring relationships into this) are all paralyzingly scary. But man, not having enough money for rent is a realistic possibility in my life.

I am so not ready to be an adult.

Driving Mix 3

Making #4 tomorrow, slacked off in July.

BoA :: Did Ya?

BoA :: Obsessed

BoA :: Eat You Up

Ingrid Michaelson :: The Way I Am

Animal Collective :: Cuckoo Cuckoo

John Frusciante :: Song To Sing When I'm Lonely

John Legend :: Let's Get Lifted

John Legend :: Used to Love U

John Mayer :: Clarity

John Mayer :: Gravity

Citizen Cope :: Let The Drummer Kick That

Beyonce :: Ego

Trey Songz f/ Soulja Boy :: LOL :-)

Young Money :: Every Girl

Drake :: Best I Ever Had

Sara Bereilles :: Gravity

Jeremih :: Birthday Sex

Keri Hilson f/ Ne-Yo and Kanye :: Knock You Down

Ginuwine :: Pony

Kid Cudi :: Day and Night (Crooker's Remix)

This is clearly the Mix of Johns and Outdated Radio Hits.

Girls vs. Boys

This show was great. At first I was worried it would be cliche or just a modern version of Spring Awakening (which it kind of was) but I really enjoyed it.

The show is centered around a bunch of high school students who are playing "The Game," which was obviously related to love and dating. The actual rules and objectives of the game were the least clear, but from what Amy and I deduced there was no way to win. Only ways to lose. You were out of the game (and "bled" rose petals all over the place) if you got your heart broken. The metaphor mostly seems simple enough, but it took me and Amy a really long time to get to that conclusion. Though you got the general gist of whether the scene was good or bad, the logistics were difficult to decipher.

However, the energy of the cast made up for the kinks that still need to be worked out. The show was young (I'd say "hip" but that automatically makes me not so), relevant, and pretty daring at times. The opening number was spectacular, reminiscent of "Totally Fucked" if I do say so myself. But all the little details, usually involving cell phone usage, were just so accurate in how acutely awkward they were; the phone-tag scene comes to mind immediately. Also, the amount of "real" dancing in the show was impressive. The girls especially were very talented and they incorporated some pretty hard-core contemporary steps, which you usually don't see in any musical.

The second act needed a lot more work than the first. It becamse very dialogue heavy and, in my opinion, had one too many subplots. Jason became a caricature and at times seemed like he was just imitating Heath Ledger's Joker. And it was a poor imitation at that. The excessive gunfire at the end was also irritating. As were some of the incredibly long dances (the number about the pills and sex come to mind). Also, "To Write Love On Her Arms" made me cringe.

Which leads me to my final criticism: I know that cutting is a difficult, sensitive and VERY important topic, and I respected the show for addressing it (because I think it often gets left by the wayside when suicide gets brought up) but that number added nothing to the discussion or the show. Come to think of it now, the show almost threw that issue away, making it leverage for blackmail and, in the end, curing it with the love from a significant other. Also, the severity of the condition was damped by the fact that people were metaphorically cutting themselves and each other throughout the whole show. I get that it was part of that larger metaphor, beating yourself up and breaking your own heart, etc. but...I don't know. Clearly this is an issue very close to me; I was proud I made it through the big song and actually watched the character cut, but at the end I was so shaky and light-headed I had to go lay down in the lobby for a few minutes. OK, sorry this has turned into more of a rant. That was not my intention. Let's get back on track:

I really, really enjoyed this show. There are definitely things to be tweaked or, in very few cases, reworked, but the show took a lot of risks and had a lot of fun. It was loud, it was funny, it was relevant. Definitely 2nd favorite of the summer.

The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books here. How do your reading habits stack up?

Instructions:
Copy this into your Notes. Look at the list and put an 'X' before those you have read. Tag other book nerds.

1 ( ) Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 ( ) The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3 ( ) Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 (X)Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 (X)To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 ( ) The Bible >>not all of it!
7 ( ) Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 (X) Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 ( ) His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 ( ) Great Expectations - Charles Dickens

Total: 3

11 ( ) Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 ( ) Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 ( ) Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 ( ) Complete Works of Shakespeare >>again, too many
15 ( ) Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 ( )The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien X
17 ( ) Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 (X) Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 (X) The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 ( ) Middlemarch - George Eliot

Total: 5

21 ( ) Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 (X) The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 ( ) Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 ( ) War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 (X) The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
27 ( ) Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 (X) Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 ( ) Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 ( ) The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame

Total: 8

31 ( ) Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 ( ) David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 ( )Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 ( ) Emma-Jane Austen
35 ( ) Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 (X)The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis (Isn't this the same as 33?)
37 (X)The Kite Runner - Khaled Hossein
38 ( ) Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 (X) Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 ( ) Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne

Total: 11

41 (X)Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 (X)The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 ( )One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 ( ) A Prayer for Owen Meany - John Irving
45 ( ) The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 ( ) Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 ( ) Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 ( ) The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 ( ) Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 ( ) Atonement - Ian McEwan

Total: 13

51 ( ) Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 ( ) Dune - Frank Herbert
53 ( ) Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 ( ) Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 ( ) A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 ( ) The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 ( ) A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 (X) Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 (X) The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night - Mark Haddon
60 ( ) Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Total: 15

61 ( ) Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 ( ) Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 ( ) The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 (X) The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 ( ) Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 ( ) On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 ( ) Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 ( ) Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 ( ) Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70 ( ) Moby Dick - Herman Melville

Total: 16

71 ( ) Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 ( ) Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 (X) The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 ( ) Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 ( ) Ulysses - James Joyce
76 ( ) The Inferno – Dante
77 ( ) Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 ( ) Germinal - Emile Zola
79 ( ) Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 ( ) Possession - AS Byatt

Total: 17

81 ( ) A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 ( ) Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 ( ) The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 ( ) The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 ( ) Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 ( ) A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 (X)Charlotte’s Web - EB White X
88 (X) The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 ( ) Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle X
90 ( ) The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton

Total: 19

91 ( ) Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 (X)The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 ( ) The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 ( )Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 ( ) A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 ( ) A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 ( ) The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 ( ) Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 (X) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 ( ) Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

Total: 21

Notable omissions:

( ) Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
( ) All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque
( ) The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
( ) Beowulf
( ) Doctor Zhivago by Boris Pasternak
( ) Don Quixote by Miguel Cervantes
( )Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
( ) The Illiad by Homer
( )The Jungle by Upton Sinclair
( ) Of Human Bondage by W. Somerset Maugham
(X) The Odyssey by Homer
( ) The Once and Future King by T.H. White
( ) The Portrait of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
( ) The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane
( ) Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse
( ) The Stranger by Albert Camus
( ) Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury
( )The Time Machine by H.G. Wells

Extra Points: 5
Total: 35

Adventures in Breakfast

So I've become relatively obsessed with a few food blogs this summer which, in turn has inspired me to bake a lot more. Mostly I've stuck to breakfast and dessert, but have been pouring over old Cooking Light magazines collecting recipes. So I hope to become adept at making dinners that are OTC pasta by the end of next year.

In the meantime, I thought I'd chronicle my trials (and errors), more for my own reference than anyone else's. I'll try to remember to include pictures in the future.

First up: Oatmeal Berry Pancakes from Seventeen Magazine
3/4 cup egg whites
2/3 cup chopped strawberries
1/2 cup rolled oats
1/2 tsp. sugar
Non-fat yogurt and blueberries (optional, for serving)

1. Beat the egg whites, strawberries, rolled oats, and sugar until smooth
2. Coat a non-stick sillet with cooking spray and heat. Ladle 1/4 cup of batter into the skillet. Cook until batter is set around the edges of the pan (you'll start to see little bubble), then push it toward the center with a spatula. Cook until batter sets in the center. Turn the pancake over and cook for one minute.
3. Repeat with the remaining batter. Serve with yogurt and blueberries.

Result: Made a lot of pancakes for a recipe that said it yields one serving. I can't remember exactly how many there were, but there was leftover breakfast after Patty and I had our fill. The pancakes were a little mealy with kind of a funny aftertaste. I may have needed to beat the batter longer (there were still whole oats and flecks of strawberries) but the egg whites were already so fluffy, it didn't really have the consistency of batter. Also, 3/4 cup of whites is actually a shit ton of eggs (4 or 5!). I know there were a healthy recipe, but it took a lot of ingredients and the end product wasn't that great.


Next: Cottage Cheese Pancakes from Smitten Kitchen
1 1/3 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon or pinch of ground nutmeg (optional)
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup milk
1 cup full-fat or low-fat cottage cheese
3 tablespoons butter, melted
2 large egg yolks
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/3 cups finely chopped walnuts (optional)
1/3 cup dried currants, plumped (optional)
2 large egg whites
Pure maple syrup or honey, or plain yogurt (optional, for serving)

1. Lightly butter, oil, or spray your griddle–nonstick works best with these, if you have them–if needed, and preheat it over medium heat. If you are using an electric griddle, preheat it to 350 degrees F. Preheat the oven to 200 degrees F if you do not plan to serve the pancakes hot off the griddle.
2. Whisk flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon or nutmeg and salt together in a large bowl. In a separate bowl, whisk together the milk, cottage cheese, butter, egg yolks and vanilla.
3. Pour the wet ingredients over the dry ingredients and gently whisk them together, mixing just until combined. Stir in the walnuts and/or currants, if using them.
4. Beat the two egg whites until they are stiff but not dry and fold them into the batter.
5. The batter will be thick and bubbly - similar to cake batter. Spoon 1/3 cup batter onto the griddle for each pancake, nudging the batter into rounds. These are thick and might take a little longer to cook than most other pancakes. Cook until the top of each pancake is starting to dry around the edges - you will get a few bubbles here and there - then turn and cook until the underside is lightly browned. These will keep in a 200 degrees F oven while you finish making the rest, but they are best served immediately, when they are at their lightest and puffiest.

Big changes: I didn't include any of the optional ingredients. I also halved the recipe and didn't separate & beat the egg whites (it just seemed like too much work).
Result: They did take a while to cook, as the recipe said they would. I tried turning the heat up, but they burned quickly. The extra time is definitely worth it, though. The pancakes were extremely fluffy and had a hint of cottage cheese flavor (I may actually add more the next time I try these). The half-recipes made 10 pancakes total.

A few more coming...

Barefoot at CVS

30 Rock Drinking Game

Drink every time...

...Tracy says "Liz Lemon."

...Liz says "baby," "blerg," or "poo."

...Jack gives Liz advice.

...Kenneth says "television" or "mother/mama."

...Jenna whines about something.

...Dot Com is the voice of reason.

...Jonathon makes an awkward sexual reference about Jack.

...Toofer wears a sweater vest.

...Dr. Spaceman is on screen.

...Frank makes fun of Jenna.

If you really want to get fucked up...

Drink every time Liz is eating something.

Another Apology

I have never been that crazy about Harry Potter.

This does not mean I am a Communist.

My Apoplogies

I'm sorry, but I have almost no desire to see 500 Days of Summer.

There are a lot of reasons I don't want to see it, but they can pretty much be described by the much-used comparrison:

"It's this year's Garden State."

It's an anti-love story, but I think it looks just a cliche as anything else, only in different ways. It's an indie cliche. The only way it could be more so would be to include a Gllenhaal.

My Newest/First Ambition

For the past few days I have been reading Leg the Spread, a book all about one woman's adventures as a clerk at The Merc. I've plowed through it, which is nothing new for me, but I am having uncharacteristically strong emotional reactions to it. The reason, I believe, is that it is the first female perspective I've been offered. Also, the first of a newcomer to the floor. So much of the terror and pressure she describes were absent from the other trading books I've look through, books that are written by seasoned, male traders.

It has provided me with a new perspective on the trading world and ignited a passion in me that I've never had before; it has opened my eyes to a job that I want. I don't want to be to hasty in this decision, but I really want to be a trader.

There are pros (defy stereotypes, gain respect, earn shitloads of money) and cons (be constantly stressed, huge risk, become obsessed with money) of the profession, but as I read and the more I'm around trading, the more I want to do it. There is something, an "it factor" if you will, that outweighs all of those logical considerations. It doesn't matter that I don't have the personality for it or I still don't really know what's going on nor how much of the book is accurate, I want this. And I'm going to work to get it. I've never felt so focused on anything (at least career-wise) my entire life.

We'll see how I feel at the end of the summer, first semester, and my Duke career, but right now I'm gonna give it what I've got.

Checking In

Where I've been so far this summer

Theater:
Jersey Boys
Lieutenant of Inishmore
Rock n Roll
Boleros for the Disenchanted

El Grito del Bronx
*Still to see: Rod Blagojevich Superstar, Boys and Girls

Movies:
The Soloist
The Hangover
Up
Away We Go
The Proposal

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
*Still to see: Public Enemies, 500 Days of Summer, The Ugly Truth, Julie and Julia, Time Traveler's Wife

Music:
The Dirty Projectors and The Sea and Cake
Lupe Fiasco
Ne-Yo
Explosions in the Sky
*Still to see: Maybe Lolla?

My Face Just Melted

I cannot believe I almost didn't go. That would have been the biggest mistake of my life and I would never have known what I missed. That is, unless I saw Explosions 10 years from now and then I'd be kicking myself for not going earlier.

I was first introduced to Explosions in the Sky during my first year as Talent Show producer. A band named Shazbot auditioned with the song "First Breath After Coma" and we put them as the second to last band in the show (an honor, the closing band was always a feel good DMB/Phish cover, the penultimate band was always the most talented). Rehearsals were always long and stressful, usually upwards for four hours after most of us had already been in rehearsals for The Music Man. By a stroke of pure luck, Shazbot was always the last band to rehearse on their scheduled days. With most of our responsibilities taken care of the production team plus the tech directors would settle into the plush seats in the shadows on stage right, breathe a sigh of relief, and allow Shazbot to calm us all down. Needless to say Explosions in the Sky holds a great amount of sentimental value, talent show was my life and family for the second half of my high school career.

Explosion's "The Earth is Not a Cold Dead Place" was one of those albums my friends and I discovered and felt a personal responsibility toward. The music was the soundtrack to a lot of important moments in our lives and began to define our group (before our collective ska phase). Each song reminded me of a different person or moment and could bring me to tears in a matter of minutes.

But what was different about last night was that it was not a group experience. Though I was there with friends and hundreds of other people, I didn't feel the need to connect with anyone except the musicians. I stood still and let the music move through me, which sounds ridiculous but it wasn't. Since they have no vocals, Explosions in the Sky can play turn their amps up as loud as they fucking want and I swear you feel the pulse of the music almost as much as you hear it. I allowed myself to think about nothing and be consumed; I lost myself and all of my stress in the music and came out in a much better place that when I went in. So even though I freaked out with Lizzy and Grant after the show, I was completely alone for an hour and a half and was allowed to cry, smile, sway, and just BE, which -even in the lazy days of summer- can be very difficult.

Fort Sheridan, the Moon, and the skunk in my garage were all enjoyable but relatively inconsequential because I was still recovering from the experience of the show. But it was really nice to see new people who know and related to a very, very different side of me. It was exactly the evening I needed and I would urge anyone to go see EITS as soon as they possibly can.

Thrifiting Bonanza

Definite success. Got all this for $20 and some change (and yes, that's a real Lacoste sweater).

Most excited for the boots, studded belt, and CUMBERBUND that I thoroughly intend to wear as a belt. Also can't wait to rough up those boyfriend jeans.

Gone Too Soon (No, Not MJ)

I'm not one to gush about boyfriends, so I will try to keep this short and sweet. But it should be said that I am madly in love with Joe, hadn't seen him for a month and a half, and had just over 48 hours to be with him. I tried not to pack the schedule and I think we found a pretty good balance. Here's the rundown:

Friday: Picked him up at the airport. ate at Bank Lane, showed off Market Square and LFHS. Dinner with Amy, Holly, Mike, and AJ Ross's flamboyant twin, followed by twelve rounds of Scattergories in the studio.

Saturday: Ran errands together for Mom. He handled an Italian family gathering with ease, we took a long walk back home. I introduced him to 30 Rock (another convert!). We ended the night with nachos and $6 pitchers at Chief's, then watched Catch Me If You Can at home.

Sunday: I went to church and a work meeting alone, then had breakfast with Joe at Egg Harbor. Took him to the beach for a few hours, and two episodes of 30 Rock later he had to be at the airport. I cried the whole way home.

Again, I don't want to fawn over him, but the weekend really reminded me how happy I am with Joe and what a good match we are for each other. I've repeated this a million times by now, but we value the same things in most aspects of our lives; school, career, extracurriculars, outside friends and socializing, etc. We don't like to make big romantic productions out of anything (but we do appreciate thoughtful gifts or expressions of love, which are often pretty simple but very touching), and we have similar views of what I call the "big three" of CG: race, gender, and sexuality.

This summer I have realized how nice it is to not have to explain myself, my priorities, and my views to someone. Over the past nine months Joe and I have really learned how to communicate and it's so comforting knowing that he will respect my choices regarding these values because he has them himself. It leaves a lot of room for just being happy all the time and allows us to quickly address problems as they arise. And he just always seems to know the right thing to say; he made me cry multiple times over the weekend and a lot of his FB messages have moved me to tears at work.

OK, enough of that. This next year will be amazing and we will survive the next month or so with no problem (and maybe a second reunion???)

Where're My Cloves?

Last night Holly and I saw The Dirty Projectors and The Sea and Cake FOR FREE at Millennium Park. It was sweet. However, we were too far from the stage to even see the bands, let alone take pictures. Since Holly didn't know the music that well, we spent most of the time drinking and making fun of the people around us.

Observe:


The really cool, experienced, super awesome teenagers. They were pulling from a plastic bottle of whiskey (circled) and chasing with a generic 2 liter of soda.



Oh yeah. They had skateboards.



TWO BUCK CHUCK! We were drunk enough we almost asked if they'd share/trade for our PBR.



Then there were the hipster parents. I would not have described the scene as "child-proof" or "baby-friendly" but hey, I don't have a kid. What do I know? Maybe early exposure to pot has proven beneficial later in life...



And the guy with the fluorescent orange hat. RAD.


Finally: Had to lay down to take in the beauty that is Chicago. It's not touristy, I live here.

Look Around

From Holly:

"PS- We need to make a friend with a yacht so we can go boating on a day like today."

In Chicago, we pretty much skip spring. Like, the entire season. It's a pretty nice deal except when winter drags on through May and half of June like it did this year (usually my hide-out-in-NC-til-summer-in-Chicago-arrives plan works better). Now that it's sunny and warm, I am taking advantage of every moment I have outdoors.

I walked to the neighborhood pool and just felt that I had to take pictures because I truly believe my community (pseudo-gated as it may be) is one of the most beautiful places in the world:







This one just amused me:

A bush made out of sod covering!

Parliaments on the Rocks

So today was exactly the type of day I want to have every day for the rest of my summer life. I watched Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion with my mom in the morning. Spent the afternoon wandering/exploring the new high school with Holly. We ended up getting lost more than once in the mix of new hallways and relocated library, cafeteria, and music rooms.

I was about to go home when Holly remembered her mom's friend has an art studio tucked back in the forest of Lake Bluff and that she is allowed to use while this friend is away. I grabbed a sketchbook and Almost Like Being In Love and we spent a few hours just drawing, talking, reading, and napping (OK, that was just me) in this gorgeous club house hidden among trees and gravel roads. I swear it was taken straight out of a movie, probably something sappy and over dramatic that Diane Lane would be in.

She dropped me off at work and a few hours later Nick Shandor (NOT Devonshire) and I went out for drinks. The Lantern was crowded, so we decided to try Highwood, which everyone always says is "supposed to be a great bar scene," but no one ever seems to make it out there. We located The Wooden Nickel and went inside for some drinks. I had gin and tonics while he made the bartender make some sugary drink that looked manly, then we moved to the worn in leather couches and ate stale Mike and Ikes that came from one of those vending machines your parents would never give you a quarter for.

We were about to call it a night when Nick looked at the Walgreen's we'd parked next to and proposed that we cap the night off by sharing a cigarette. There was no question to the brand (although some reminiscing almost sent us on an all-night quest for cloves) nor the location. We arrived at the sailing dock at the beach around 12:30, found a great place on the boulders and proceeded to kill about half the pack (oops).

It was great to talk about what I am passionate about now. And the more we compare Duke's social life to Dartmouth's, the more pleased I become with our campus culture, or at least the people I've chosen to surround myself with there. It's fun catching up with high school friends like Nick that you haven't kept in great touch with because you still remember each other's high school selves and can pretty easily make a comparison to who they have become so many years later. He reminded me how much more I love myself and how much happier I am. In high school, I was always looking for a spark; I was surrounded by so many people who were really passionate about an issue, usually the environment, and was looking for something to move me in the same way. I've definitely found that with defMo and Common Ground, and I'm so glad to have found my voice and started to figure out who I am, what I want, and what is most important to me. And having people around that I can share this new-and-improved self with is a blessing I didn't really have in high school either.

And I can see how much Nick has grown, too. I tell him I will always and forever call him "Shandor," even though he thinks Nick Devonshire is who he really is. I like to think that I saw the beginning of his transformation, that I was a catalyst in his coming out of his shell. I'm sad I couldn't witness all of his adventures at Exeter because it sounds like he was at his happiest then, but I think we've reached a similar place in our lives. Even if he is a little frattier than I'd ever picture him.

I am glad today happened when it did. I was just starting to get complacent with how the summer was going, but also upset with the fact that the next few months would fly by with great monotony. Today reminded me you don't have to make huge plans to have adventures or heart-to-hearts, and usually it's the ones that aren't planned that stick with you the longest.

10 Year Old Wisdom

"'They won't let you and [your boyfriend] get married, right?' he asked pensively, collecting the pertinent facts.
'Right.'
'And a long time ago, they wouldn't let Rosa Parks sit in a bus either -- right?' I could see where this was going and I loved him for it.
'Right.'
'And now everybody thinks the people who arrested her were skanks, right?'
'Right.'
Noah shrugged and swung himself into the sky again. As far as he was concerned, it was an open-and-shut case.
'So how come they don't know that in a hundred years we'll think the exact same things about the skanky guys who won't let you get married?' Since there was no practical answer, I stopped looking for one and hugged him instead. He had it coming.
The we hit the jungle gym."

-Almost Like Being In Love

Sometimes, I wish adults reasoned like kids. Things would get done much faster.

Decisions, Decisions

LOLLA SCHEDULE
(This is if I find $205 for a 3-day pass, which probably means no Pitchfork)

Friday, August 7
3:00 Bon Iver
4:00 Ben Folds
5:00 Fleet Foxes
6:00 Decemberists
7:00 Of Montreal
8:00 Kings of Leon or Andrew Bird/Peter Bjorn and John)

Saturday, August 8
2:30 Los Campesinos!
4:30 Artic Monkeys
5:30 Santigold
6:30 TV on the Radio or Lykke Li (OMG WORST TIMING EVERRR)
7:30 Animal Collective

Sunday, August 9
2:30 Kaiser Chiefs
4:30 Vampire Weekend
5:30 Cold War Kids
6:30 Deerhunter or Lou Reed
7:30 Silversun Pickups

Consolidation

I think I am going to get rid of my Tumblr, just for the sake of simplifying my internet life. I was going to forward Tumblr my updates to my Twitter, but it ruins the aesthetic I'm going for (and allows posts to be longer than 140 characters...cheating!). I used the Tumblr only for quotes and recording interesting things I found online (mostly articles and videos) but I think that this blog can serve that purpose as well.

Here are a list of blogs/sites I have bookmarked over the course of the last year or so (beyond FML and TFLN):

hipster runoff
lookbook
white whine
my life is average
look at this fucking hipster
engrish funny
awkward family photos
this is why you're fat
why the fuck do you have a kid
spotted: dc interns
xkcd
sea of shoes
the sartorialist
happiest people ever
rumplo
hype machine
nosh and tell
natalie dee
mcsweeneys
the cobrasnake
pets who want to kill themselves

The list will go on once I get back to my laptop and go through the ridiculous amount of bookmarks I've acquired this summer.

CBOE Update 1

So it's been two full weeks and I haven't said anything about my internship yet. The truth is, there is not much to report. The first day or so was incredibly overwhelming, but once I realized I was to be a stereotypical "intern" (i.e. coffee grabbing, errand runner) I calmed down a fair amount. The day consists mostly of crosswords or chick lit and praying that a trader needs someone to go buy him lunch so I can see some sunlight.

The people are certainly the most interesting part of the job. Many times it feels like I'm working with a bunch of overgrown frat stars, which is often probably the case. It's a total Boys Club feel, out of hundreds of traders, runners, monitors, etc. there are probably only 10-20 girls on the floor and not many of them work together. Luckily for me there are two girls at my firm that I spend most of my time with; they're both south siders, totally brash and able to hang with the guys and all their crude jokes and foul language. I'm not quite so brash, but I think I've made it clear I'm not quite as dainty as everyone thinks.

I do worry that my supervisor thinks I'm not doing enough, so when he gave me a textbook on options trading and futures contracts, I totally dove in. I've been highlighting and taking notes, quizzing myself at the end of each chapter. My goal is to finish the book by the time Joe comes to visit. My other goal is to be able to explain, in layman's terms, what, exactly, my company does. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), none of the other interns seem to share my drive. When I explained to one fellow intern how excited I was to have an on-going project and something to learn/study because I get antsy when I have nothing to do, I was met with a blank stare. Actually, it was beyond blank. He looked at me like I was from outer space.

But it's really a great job and a great opportunity. It's weird to think that I only have six weeks (18 days?!) left. I'm looking forward to learning and picking up even more as I go along.

Misnomer

Rock'n'Roll by Tom Stoppard
(At Goodman Theater through June 7)

The first line on the Goodman's website regarding this show states:

"Rock 'n' Roll is a sweeping and passionate love story that spans two countries, three generations and 22 turbulent years."

While that is, for the most part, accurate (I'd contest the "sweeping and passionate" part) it is not necessarily positive. There were many things I could critique about the play but without a doubt its greatest weakness was its length. Twenty years is a lot of time to cover, no matter what subject you focus on. And when one tries to cover multiple facets of a story that spans multiple decades, the narrative becomes overcrowded leaving the audience with a bit of sensory (or maybe just information) overload.

The Cold War is a big subject to take on, even if you simply approach it from a historical/political perspective. But then to mix in an ailing family, a teenage-hormone-fueled love story, and the entire history of rock'n'roll...it was just too much. It felt as if Stoppard had a problem deciding what he wanted to focus on, so he just threw in a bit of everything. Most of the political discussions were over my head and left me wondering "Is that how most dinner party discussion go?" Granted, I'm not the most informed source on Prague during the Cold War, but I don't think one should have to be a history professor (or read three pages of program notes) to grasp the core plot of a play.

The strange love story between Jan and Esme was all that really held the story together. And that became creepy in the second act when the actors switched and started playing the daughters of their Act I characters. It was a weak attraction and a weak glue that ultimately did not work. The show would have been much better off closing the curtain at intermission and excluding the segments from the 80s and 90s.

Also slightly disappointing was the lack of musical discussion. Though music had a role, it was a supporting one at best. The soundtrack was fantastic, but was always either background noise or transition music (that came in WAY too loud and was more scary than invigorating). It definitely was not integral enough to call the show "Rock'n'Roll." Thankfully, I located the soundtrack on the Goodman's website: http://www.goodmantheatre.org/Season/RocknRoll/RNRPlaylist.aspx

However, there were a few redeeming moments in the first act that made the mind-boggling second half worth sitting through. Timothy Edward Kane was great as Jan, the Communist protege turned apathetic anarchist with the vinyl collection the fueled every music-related moment of the show. But the real show stealer was Mary Beth Fischer as Eleanor, whose portrayal of a scholarly, accomplished woman torn apart and isolated by breast cancer brought me to tears.

All in all, a worthwhile experience, but definitely not for the faint-hearted or those who can't stand more than 10 minutes of uncomfortable political discussions over dinner.

DILLO (not the grill)

I can confidently say that this year's Dillo Day went better than the last. But considering that last year ended with me vomiting an entire bottle of red wine between the hours of 4 and 5 am, that's not really saying much. I drove down by myself because Holly wasn't feeling well and I (surprisingly) didn't get lost on the way. Once I arrived in Evanston, I went to Whole Foods, hoping to pick up some "soup" (read: red wine) for posterity, but PBR was on sale, so I grabbed that and chugged a few before heading to Mike Posner. I met up with Mona (former resident, future party companion) and we sang every word to every song.

When the set ended, I went to check the time and the worst thing ever happened: My phone died.

This had three awful consequences:
1) I did not meet up with Katie Quinn
2) I did not meet up with Ankit Jain
3) I did not call Liz

But I decided to make the best of my buzz and wander around downtown Evanston, formulating a plan along the way. Around 7:30 I was thoroughly disappointed in American Apparell's "sale" and sober enough to drive home. But by the time my phone charged and I called Liz, she was still in Milwaukee helping her boyfriend move out of his apartment. Even if she had left that second, there was no way we were going to make it back down to Wilmette in time for Rocky Horror. I was too exhausted to even think about going back out, so we decided to take a rain check. So the day was a little disappointing; not exactly the "last hurrah" I wanted before entering internship hell. But! This is the summer of no-whining. So...

SILVER LINING TIME:

• There are two more screenings of RHPS in Wilmette before August, so this was NOT my last chance to see it this summer.
• When Liz and I do go in June/July, we'll be way more prepared, aka have better outfits.
• Posner's set was so fucking fun and totally worth the trip.
• I just got an ahhh-mazing drunk dial from AJ2.
• There are four leftover (16oz.) cans of PBR in my trunk right now!
• Once again, I've proven to myself that LDOC >>> Dillo Day (and by proxy, Duke >>> NU)

All in all, a successful excursion.

Live Action Tarantino

The Leiutenant of Inishmore by Martin McDonagh
(At Northlight Theater through June 7)

I walked into this show with basically no idea of what I was in for. I knew it was a dark comedy by a playwright Amy loves and the whole thing was centered around the murder of a hitman's cat. Not necessarily the most enticing offer, but I agreed to go because this summer is about seizing little opportunities in hopes of finding the occasional gem.

And this show turned out to be a hilarious, raucous, blood-soaked gem.

The show worked so well as a whole, I am having trouble picking out the pieces that made it so successful. The script was an amazing starting point, so outlandish and satirical; it left a lot of room for fun. The acting was great (save for a little trouble with the Irish accents), with everyone exuding just the right amount of crazy. And the set and EFFECTS tied the show together so well. But beyond that, I just know I had a fucking great time. There was blood everywhere, bullets flying, and of course a few dismembered corpses for good measure. I laughed the whole way through.

The whole production reminded me of the scene in Pulp Fiction when Marvin gets shot in the face. I've seen that movie dozens of times and I still laugh every time the gun goes off. It's part shock, part disbelief, and part confusion that lead to my completely inappropriate response, but it seems to be the only way I can deal with something so ridiculous, even if guilt eats at me the whole time. And that's exactly what happened in this story; sure I felt bad when the female lead shot her new found boyfriend over a cat-related misunderstanding, but in that moment -like in all the others- you had to step back, realize this was all about a fucking cat, and laugh the horror away.

678-999-8212

I made my first driving mix of the summer yesterday just because I can't stand listening to my sister's music (read: Jonas Brothers) in the car anymore. And the only CD Andy listens to is the Pirates of the Caribbean soundtrack. Most of this is re-discovered because I'm trying to clean up my iTunes. Please forgive the bad hip-hop, especially Plies, most of them remind me of good parties or Joe.

This is the full playlist (it didn't all fit on one CD so I had to chop it down a bit)

Jamie Foxx f/ T-Pain :: Blame It
Asher Roth :: I Love College
Soulja Boy :: Kiss Me Thru The Phone
Plies :: Please Excuse My Hands
Sam Sparro :: Black and Gold
Lady Gaga :: Poker Face
MIMS :: Move (If You Wanna)
T-Pain :: Chopped and Skrewed
Head Automatica :: Beating Heart Baby
Ratatat :: Seventeen Years
Beck :: Loser
No Doubt :: Just A Girl
Ne-Yo :: Miss Independent
Goldfish :: Mbira Beat
The Bravery :: Tyrant
The Bravery :: Believe
Jeff Buckley :: I Want Someone Badly
The Beastie Boys :: Girls
The Dandy Warhols :: Bohemian Like You
The Dandy Warhols :: Not If You Were The Last Junkie On Earth
Does It Offend You, Yeah? :: Let's Make Out
Alphabeat :: Fascination
Alphabeat :: What Is Happening?
The Dodos :: Red And Purple
The Dodos :: Fools

I'm currently revamping the following playlists and will post when they are close to perfection: Adult Activities, ChillMaxRelax, Drunk Karaoke, Hipster Dance Party, pAArty, and Work Ittt.

V-A-L-L-I

I finally saw Jersey Boys (second Bucket List task accomplished)! It was technically a Christmas gift (accompanied by a dinner at The Ritz, fancy schmancy), but this week was this first time my schedule allowed for spending an entire day down town. At first, I was a little disappointed because Frankie Valli was played by the understudy, but the entire cast was fantastic. I liked the structure of the script, the dialogue was funny, and they worked in all musical numbers so seamlessly. I still can't believe how many songs I knew. "Big Girls Don't Cry," (not the Fergie version) "December 1963 (Oh What A Night)," "Workin' My Way Back To You," and "Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You." are all originally by The Four Seasons.

Watching the "real Italians" in the show made me really proud of my heritage, but it also made me wish that my family were a little louder and more closely connected with the mafia (note: I have absolutely no idea how closely connected we are, but my guess would be not at all). The men are smoother, the women are stronger, everyone is a little more honest and a little more complicated. The Italian side of my family is actually relatively small, polite, and soft-spoken. But I think I've started to grow into the stereotype the longer I live on my own.

The show also made me think where I would have been socially if I were alive in the 60's. I always claim that I would have been at Woodstock, a totally hippie-runaway. But every time I hear that feel-good music that seemed to be holding on to the ideals of the 50's and not quite ready to jump into the disco-crazed, polyester-covered 70's, I am just elated and can't help but do the twist. And if my parents were anywhere near as loving, supportive, or family-oriented as they are now, there's no way I'd be running away for California.

Ah, well. In another life.

Get Ready, CBOT

I OFFICIALLY HAVE A JOB.

After a week of leaving voicemails, I got a call from my contact (boss?) at the Chicago Board of Trade this morning to set a start date. My 8-week internship will begin next Monday at 8:00am, which gives me less than six days to 1) figure out exactly what the CBOT is, 2) brief myself on everything that's happening with the economy right now via WSJ online, and 3) squeeze in most of the day-long adventures on my bucket list.

I have absolutely no idea what to expect, but the little I do know sounds pretty sweet: I'll be working on LaSalle St. in the heart of the financial district, I will spend most of my time on the trading floor, and I will get out around 3:30 every day. Other than that, though, I'm completely clueless.

Usually, uncertainty makes me uneasy and this case is no exception. I feel completely under qualified for this job and am nervous about entering corporate America. I mean, I usually can't stomach the career fairs at Duke and the Board will probably be the BC on steroids. But I have resolved to go in there and kick some Wall Street ass. I am intelligent, talented, and more than capable of hanging with the big boys. I just have to go in prepared and put together and be extremely assertive and motivated.

It won't be a walk in the park, but it's not like I am climbing Everest either.
Let's do this.

Summer 2009 Bucket List

First thing's first. If you don't define your destination before you set out on a journey, you're shooting in the dark (mixed metaphor, sorry). Plus, making lists is what I do best.

• go to Mars Cheese Castle
  
• buy vintage cowboy boots
  
• visit the Art Institute (5/21), Museum of Contemporary Art, Museum of Science and Industry, Field Museum
  
• see a Second City show
  
• finally see Jersey Boys (5/27)
  
• garage sale day
  
• attend a Cubs Game
  
• DILLO DAY (05/30)
  
• attend a midnight madness screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show
  
• find a new perfume
  
• learn choreo from YouTube
  
• record choreo on YouTube
  
• bar crawl
  
• discover new music venues (06/22, 07/01)
  
• picnic
  
• take a bike ride along the shore
  
• bake more often
  
• take a free yoga class in Grant Park
  
• go back to that drive-in theater in Wisco
  
• watch the sunrise at the beach
  
• find another outdoor film festival
  
• attend Pitchfork, the Taste of Chicago (07/01), and Lolla
  
• draw and paint more often
  
• roadtrip somewhere
  
• finish Awaaz mix before school starts
  
• practice Italian
  
• make a really good impression at the Board of Trade
  
• TV show marathons (30 Rock, Arrested Development)
  
• take class from the Lou Conte Dance Studio (06/03), the Giordano Dance School, CultureShock @ Visceral Studio, and HipHop Connxion @ Dance Connxion Studio
  
  to be continued...

Domestic Blog #1

It seems that all of my Duke friends are away from home this summer. Most are in DC or New York City, living in subletted apartments for the duration of their internships with non-profit or consulting companies. Others are a bit further away: South America, Africa, Europe, either DukeEngaging or performing some other type of service. They are taking advantage of the opportunities and resources that only an elite university like Duke can offer and they are trying, in their own small way, to utilize their education and share their blessings in order to make the world a better place.

Where am I while all this world-changing is occurring? Good ole Lake Forest, Illinois.

By now I should be used to living at home all summer. I wasn't allowed to go to sleep-away camp; my family never takes vacations; even since moving to college, I have come home for almost every break during the school year (the two fall breaks I attended Common Ground are the only exceptions). I lived and worked at home the past two summers and, though it wasn't the most exciting couple of months, I survived just fine. But this year, living at home is really getting to me. I feel like I am passing up a lot of opportunities that I won't find again once I leave Duke. Everyone is going out an conquering the world while I'm practically back in high school again, living by my parents' rules and just trying to get a little extra spending cash.

But my pessimism is already starting to bug me more than the 'burbs are. This has the potential to be my best summer yet: I have a great job lined up and all of my high school friends are home. I'm old enough to really enjoy the beautiful city I live so close to and since I'm not paying rent, I'll actually be able to afford all the city has to offer. Chicago isn't any less valuable just because it happens to be close to my house. The city is full of cultural resources and learning opportunities, it just takes a little initiative to take advantage of them.

That is why I am going to blog this summer. I want to challenge myself to lead a life interesting enough to merit frequent electronic updates. When I sit down and think about it, plenty of my Duke friends are living at home and I want to prove that you don't have to be abroad to see something new or change someone's life. It's possible to have fun outside of NYC. It's just a matter of desire and action. If you want to do something badly enough, you will. Simple as that.

And I want to have a damn good summer.

So here it is: my summer of suburban survival. I hope I squeeze every last drop out of these three months. Hope the North Shore is ready, I sure am.